The Butler Project

I need to vent. I was doing a little reading today and I came across a real gem of an article titled Living Below Your Means: Control Vs. Competence. I know, the title should have tipped me off, but it didn’t.

It started off easy enough, predictably talking about the benefits of living below your means, many of the same points I used in my post yesterday.

Then, the author introduces us to “Paul Minsky, a California psychologist who specializes in money issues.” Apparently Paul “says not being in debt may make you look incompetent.”

Well, that’s just what we needed. A psychologist to tell us that if we’re not in debt, we look incompetent.

Hurry and go buy a house you can’t afford or you’ll look incompetent. Hurry!

I know. It sounds crazy, so here’s the exact quote: “The issue isn’t so much that not being in debt represents safety, security and freedom, but rather that your expenditures represent your competence.”

Minsky has more wisdom to share: “Our society promotes more spending, more credit card debt. What do you do when you don’t feel so good? Most people say they spend — that offsets the stress of being in debt. If you undertake a program of debt reduction it’s counter cultural. More is better than less, shop ’til you drop.”

Let me get this right, If I “undertake a program of debt reduction, it’s counter cultural.”

So, really I have to go into debt.

I can’t help going into debt.

We all just go into debt. That’s what we do.

Especially when we “don’t feel so good.”

What the heck is the author trying to tell us here? That, yeah, it would be great if we could all be in control of our spending and live below our means, but since our culture is set up so that having things represents competence, it just can’t be done? Does she really think, as her title suggests that you can either be in control of your money or you can look competent?

Horse Pucky! Bull Honky. Are you buying this?

I know, I know, we judge others by their stuff; I already posted about that. But, come on. Is this really going to be an excuse now? “I can’t get out of debt. People will think I’m incompetent if I don’t buy this.” What a load of crap!

Excuses

OK, so maybe I’m preaching to the choir. If you’re reading this blog, you probably have better grasp of the big picture. You’re not worried about what people are thinking. You’re laying the foundation to build the life you want to live, not the life society is trying to dictate. But this might be a good time to reflect on what excuses you’re using.

Cue the sad music: Do you not have enough time? Are the people in your life bringing you down? Is there just no way to overcome your troubled childhood? Maybe you had a teacher who was mean to you in high school. Maybe your dog died.

Don’t think I’m making fun, these are all valid excuses. But they’re just that–excuses. They are doing you no good. Let go of the excuses, get off your butt, and start doing something!

Look at the Millionaires

What did Mike (advertising exec) do after 4 clients went bankrupt in the same month and left him short 2 million dollars? Sounds like a pretty good excuse to fail at just about anything. Did Mike give up? No, he worked for 4 years paying off other peoples’ mistakes.

How about Dan, who shattered the summer sales record for his company when he was in college. Did he let the other guys pull him down when they wanted to go to the movies, take a nap, or hit the pool on a hot afternoon? No, he made a commitment to succeed and nearly doubled his own record from the summer before. Did I mention he also pulled in $180,000? Not bad for a summer gig.

Do you think M.R. worried people would think he was incompetent when both he and his wife had two jobs in order to pay off their mortgage and business debts? Do you think he looks incompetent now, completely debt free with a successful furniture business and real estate developments?

If your life is not where you want it to be and you can’t see a way to get it there, you’re making excuses. It’s time to sit down, clear your the mental clutter, and figure out “’What is it that I want to become?‘ Because when [you] do that, everything else really falls into place.”

photo credit: efleming